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Gear
Here I am spun out on gear
Will tomorrow be less full of fear?
Don’t worry it’s all legal,
Free too, for those that are frugal.
Each prescription goes, if you think I’m a drain,
To fight the good fight – the war on pain.
Because the nerves won’t listen anymore,
They have panic attacks no matter the score.
Adhesions don’t know how to heal
Leaving me unsure how to feel
Unable to trust my own two feet on the floor
Did you think I was joking when I said it’s a war?
Like my body is on a spree
Desperately seeking a space to be free
Trying to find a moment of peace for my mind
Overwhelmed by all my senses find
The world is too bright and too loud
I wonder if the disease is proud
While it hides away, inactive, they say
Leaving me little to do, except pray
That I may live to see days into years
Watch my children grow up, despite all my fears
That the beast inside me will awaken
Because I do not stand here unshaken
Two battles won doesn’t constitute the war
They don’t mean it’ll stay on the floor
All I can do is to find ways to cope
To try and remind myself to live in hope
Here I am, all spun out on gear
Trying not to live in perpetual fear -
Little Messages
Little messages travel down to nerves,
That shouldn’t be.
Little messages travel down to nerves,Medication to fight that caused so much harm
I wonder why it was so important that I won,
Destroyed all the receptors it could find
Leaving me brokenLittle messages send pain through my body
That shouldn’t be.
Little messages send pain through my body
They shouldn’t beContorted, I try to fight.
But my skin is aflame,
My organs are gone, lost to the fire.
Even breathing seems to be hard,
All becauseLittle messages carry the flames throughout
That shouldn’t be.
Little messages carry the flames throughout
They shouldn’t beI need to stop the messages, it’s so clear.
The answer lies in a little vial,
To send me to sleep,
Away from the burning,
Call for a doctor, for peace, for reliefLittle messages shutting down slowly,
The answer seeps through me.
Little messages shutting down slowly,
The answer seeps through meBit by bit my body relaxes,
My brain begins to quieten.
The world seems a lot softer,
Almost aglow.
My eyelids so heavy,
Closing the world out.
Dreamless sleep awaitsLittle messages calm at last.
The answer has worked.
Little messages calm at last.
The answer has worked
